"During the war between the house of Saul and the house of David, Abner had been strengthening his own position in the house of Saul. Now Saul had a concubine named Rizpah daughter of Aiah. And Ish-Bosheth said to Abner, 'Why did you sleep with my father's concubine?'" (2 Samuel 3:6-7) The Bible doesn't tell us what Abner was doing to strengthen his position in the house of Saul and it's tempting to conclude he actually did sleep with the concubine. But we will find Abner outraged and insulted by Ish-Bosheth's claim. Abner's severing of their relationship will be so irrevocable that I really think he is innocent of the king's charges.
These charges are serious. When a king dies or is deposed by his people or is overthrown by an enemy, his royal harem goes to the man who takes his place. This means that Saul's concubines are now the concubines (legal wives but usually foreign wives without the same legal rights as Israelite wives) of Ish-Bosheth. In the ancient world, any man who slept with one of the royal concubines was announcing his bid for the throne. It was a way of saying, "I intend to take over all that belongs to the king." Later in the Bible we'll find one of King David's own sons, Absalom, sleeping with David's concubines as a way of declaring himself king in place of his father. After David's death another of his sons, Adonijah, will ask King Solomon to give him one of David's concubines in marriage but Solomon will refuse, for acceding to this request would bolster Adonijah's claims that he is the rightful heir to the throne. Also Solomon is not obligated or expected to give any woman from the royal harem to anyone in marriage; these are his wives, regardless of whether he ever consummates a relationship with any of them.
Ish-Bosheth is accusing Abner of putting himself forward as candidate for the kingship when he accuses him of sleeping with Rizpah. We'll find Abner so angry that it's generally assumed by many scholars that he did no such thing. While he may or may not have hoped to be king someday, there's no evidence he would have announced his candidacy by sleeping with a royal concubine. A man as skilled in political intrigue and military strategy as Abner would be unlikely to make a bid for the throne by committing such a lewd and disrespectful act that's capable of backfiring by alienating him from the people's affections. I think he's more likely to have been busy winning the hearts of the people by making himself likable, by putting himself in the public eye far more than Ish-Bosheth, and by presenting himself as the real power in Israel. He may never have intended any harm to Ish-Bosheth but instead may have hoped to be crowned king upon Ish-Bosheth's natural death. If it's true that Ish-Bosheth was in ill health (because evidently he never served in his father's army although he was of age, being forty years old when Abner proclaimed him king after Saul's death), Abner may have thought Ish-Bosheth would not live much longer and that he himself would seem to the people as the logical choice to succeed Ish-Bosheth. The offended speech he makes leads us to think that he was not planning a coup.
"Abner was very angry because of what Ish-Bosheth said. So he answered, 'Am I a dog's head---on Judah's side? This very day I am loyal to the house of your father Saul and to his family and friends. I haven't handed you over to David. Yet now you accuse me of an offense involving this woman! May God deal with Abner, be it ever so severely, if I do not do for David what the Lord promised him on oath and transfer the kingdom from the house of Saul and establish David's throne over Israel and Judah from Dan to Beersheba.' Ish-Bosheth did not dare to say another word to Abner, because he was afraid of him." (2 Samuel 3:8-11) He says, "What kind of man do you take me for? Did I ever do anything disloyal to your father Saul? Have I ever been anything but faithful to all of Saul's family and friends? What I've wanted more than anything is always for a relative of Saul's to wear the crown of Israel. I've been opposed to having David as king, even though I am aware he was anointed king upon command of the Lord. But I've done everything within my power to keep David from ruling the nation. If I'd really been your enemy I'd have handed you over to him, and don't think that's just an empty threat! I have enough power and influence to command soldiers to seize you and take you in chains to David in Judah. The people of your kingdom love and trust me enough that I could have led a coup against you at any time, installing David in your place---or even installing myself in your place. The people would far rather follow my lead than yours. If you don't believe me, just watch what happens as I transfer my loyalty to David. And I won't be going to him alone. Many valiant fighting men of Israel will go with me!"
Giving his allegiance to David means Abner can never be king. But we can't be sure he ever wanted to actually be king or whether he was content to run things from behind the scenes while the ineffective Ish-Bosheth sat on the throne. The fact that he's insulted enough by Ish-Bosheth's accusations to lay his own ambitions aside serves as proof that he never slept with one of the concubines or even thought of doing such a thing.
David welcomes the news that Abner is now on his side. "Then Abner sent messengers on his behalf to say to David, 'Whose land is it? Make an agreement with me, and I will help you bring all Israel over to you.' 'Good,' said David. 'I will make an agreement with you.'" (2 Samuel 3:13a) The man who placed Ish-Bosheth on the throne will be the man who helps bring about the downfall of his kingdom. Abner has never liked David and probably still doesn't like David but the two of them can be useful to each other. David won't insult Abner's honor as Ish-Bosheth did. Abner likely expects to be rewarded handsomely for his assistance, with wealth and fame and perhaps a high position in David's government. David can use a man with Abner's influence to bring on board all the people of the remaining eleven tribes who are in a position to rally support behind him. David is not a perfect man but we will never be able to doubt that he loves the Lord or that he has faith in the Lord. The Lord rewards him by doing something David's son King Solomon says the Lord does for those with whom He is pleased: "When the Lord takes pleasure in anyone's way, He causes their enemies to make peace with them." (Proverbs 16:7)
Abner and David were once enemies but are now allies for the common good of Israel and to fulfill what each of them views as his calling in life: David to the throne over the entire nation, Abner to a position of power and influence in the kingdom. But Abner still has an enemy in David's camp---a deadly enemy---who is just waiting for an opportunity to strike. As we move on through the book of 2 Samuel we'll find David's nephew Joab seizing his chance, against David's orders, to take vengeance against Abner for the death of his brother Asahel. What Joab does is wrong, for his brother wasn't murdered in cold blood but was a casualty of war, but in the long run it may be that it was best for David that the shrewd, hot-headed, and ambitious Abner doesn't remain on the scene much longer.
But before Joab carries out his revenge, Abner is instrumental to David in gaining support for his kingship, and Abner will soon relay a commanding message from David to Ish-Bosheth. Ish-Bosheth's obedience to this message reveals his fear of David and Abner and it displays his weakness of character and his unfitness to rule the Lord's people Israel.
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