Today Solomon talks about people who put on a front, who pretend to be our friends but aren't. He also discusses the horrible habit of gossip.
"Without wood a fire goes out; without a gossip a quarrel dies down. As charcoal to embers and as wood to fire, so is a quarrelsome person for kindling strife. The words of a gossip are like choice morsels; they go down to the inmost parts." (Proverbs 26:20-22) Have you ever heard the expression about a scandal or piece of gossip being a "nine days wonder"? This means it's a short-lived sensation. Most scandals and quarrels fall into that category because the interest in them lasts only until something new happens a few days later. But a gossip is like someone who keeps throwing fuel on a fire. A gossip refuses to let it die down, probably because the ongoing quarrel generates some type of enjoyment for the gossiper. That's why Solomon says gossip is to some people like choice morsels of food. He advises, "For goodness sake, let it go! Tend to your own business. The problem will soon go away if you'll just quit meddling in it."
"Like a coating of silver dross on earthenware are fervent lips with an evil heart." (Proverbs 26:23) The king is talking about putting on a front. You can plate an earthenware pot with silver, but at heart it's still made of mud. It's worthless. It's a fraud. The Lord Jesus deplored this type of character when He said to the hypocritical religious leaders, "Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You clean the outside of the cup and dish, but inside they are full of greed and self-indulgence." (Matthew 23:25) He also used another example, "Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You are like whitewashed tombs, which look beautiful on the outside but on the inside are full of the bones of the dead and everything unclean." (Matthew 23:27) The Apostle Paul accused the council of the Sanhedrin of putting on a front, calling them "whitewashed walls" and accusing them of being hypocrites in Acts 23:3 because they were sworn to uphold the law but were lawbreakers themselves.
"Enemies disguise themselves with their lips, but in their hearts they harbor deceit. Though their speech is charming, do not believe them, for seven abominations fill their hearts. Their malice may be concealed by deception, but their wickedness will be exposed in the assembly." (Proverbs 26:24-26) Most of us have had people pretend to be our friends who really weren't. I've been fooled before. The most shocking deception came from someone who pretended to be interested in learning about the Lord, who was going to church events with me, who was regularly included in small gatherings of my family, while all along she intended to try and do harm to me. Why? I wish I knew what makes some people harbor anger and evil intentions in their hearts. I wish she had actually come to know the Lord when she heard the truth of the gospel, because Jesus can heal bitter hearts. He can take away whatever makes people think that lashing out and hurting others will somehow heal the hurt in their own hearts. Solomon warns us to be on guard. We should never share a lot of private information with anyone until they have proven themselves to be genuine friends. We shouldn't place them in our inner circle until they have earned our trust.
"Whoever digs a pit will fall back into it; if someone rolls a stone, it will roll back on them." (Proverbs 26:27) Here Solomon professes his faith that the troublemaker will suffer the penalty of his wrongdoing. When digging a pit for someone else, there's always the danger of stumbling and falling into it. When rolling a large stone to hurl down on someone else, there's a possibility it might roll backwards over the one pushing it. God doesn't always have to point His finger and call judgment down on evildoers, for they are their own worst enemies. Their wickedness has a way of falling back down on their own heads. Sooner or later their way of living will take its toll on them.
"A lying tongue hates those it hurts, and a flattering mouth works ruin." (Proverbs 26:28) There is hatred in the heart of the one who lies and gossips. It's often an unfocused hatred, a feeling of anger and bitterness in general due past hurts that person has experienced or due to feelings that the world hasn't given them something it owes them. After successfully deceiving someone, the liar usually can't stand the sight of that person anymore. He knows he has trespassed against another person and deep down it makes him hate both himself and the person he sinned against. This is why it's so rare that someone like this will actually come and apologize to us. They would rather avoid us and avoid thinking about how they treated us.
No doubt Solomon had many false friends. He was the most powerful man in Israel, perhaps the most powerful man in the world at that time. He was definitely the wealthiest man in the world, even by today's standards. He learned from experience that people would lie to his face. He knew what it was like to have people say one thing and mean another. He realized people would flatter him with their lips just to be included in his inner circle and to enjoy all the privileges of palace life. This is why he advises us to be careful. He isn't saying we should be suspicious of everyone's motives, but that we should be led by the Holy Spirit. If we feel a warning in our spirit that something is kind of "off" about a person who behaves as our friend, we should take heed to that warning. We should be careful not to overshare personal details of our lives or invite them into our inner circle where they can do the most harm. We can still love and pray for that person and share the gospel with them. We can still behave in a Christlike manner. The king is just telling us to be smart. Or as Jesus put it, "Be as shrewd as snakes but as harmless as doves." (Matthew 10:16b)
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