Timnah is not marked on the map below because I had trouble finding a map that marked the city of Timnah as well as showing the borders of each tribe of Israel. On this map we see the territory occupied by the Philistines on the lefthand side. Timnah was located at the upper edge of the Philistines' territory, along the border of the territory of Dan. You'll recall that Samson is a Danite, for we were told in Chapter 13 that his father was of the tribe of Dan.
"Samson went down to Timnah and saw there a young Philistine woman. When he returned, he said to his father and mother, 'I have seen a Philistine woman in Timnah; now get her for me as my wife.'" (Judges 14:1-2) Before the Israelites took hold of the land of Canaan, the Lord commanded them, "Do not intermarry with them. Do not give your daughters to their sons or take their daughters for your sons." (Deuteronomy 7:3) When the Lord gave these orders He only mentioned seven nations of Canaan by name: the Hittites, Girgashites, Amorites, Canaanites, Perizzites, Hivites, and Jebusites. He did not mention the Philistines. But it stands to reason that, since the marriage prohibition was made because such marriages would "turn your children away from following Me to serve other gods" (Deuteronomy 7:4), that marriage was forbidden between the people of God and any heathen people.
But this woman has caught Samson's fancy and he is overcome by the desire to have her as his wife. He goes to his parents and asks them to arrange the marriage for him. His parents will need to meet with the parents of the young woman to ask her hand in marriage for their son and, if the young woman's parents agree, to settle the accompanying financial matters. Samson's mother and father are dismayed by his request. Marriage to a heathen woman is not what they want for him. "His father and mother replied, 'Isn't there an acceptable woman among your relatives or among all our people? Must you go to the uncircumcised Philistines to get a wife?'" (Judges 14:3a) They say, "Why can't you choose a God-fearing woman of Israel to be your wife? Surely there is a woman of your own nation who is just as beautiful as this Philistine! We would be happy to work out a marriage contract for you with any lovely young lady from among our own people. Why the rush? Take your time and think about this. You don't have to settle for just anybody; we'll help you get an Israelite wife from a fine family."
Samson, however, will not be dissuaded. "But Samson said to his father, 'Get her for me. She's the right one for me.'" (Judges 14:3b) When we were young and headstrong, didn't we all think we knew what was right for us? Didn't we sometimes think our parents' advice was old-fashioned and irrelevant to the times we were living in? Because Samson is determined to follow this course of action, and perhaps also because his parents have doted on and spoiled their only son, his mother and father will agree to do what he wants.
There is some disagreement among scholars regarding what this next verse means. "(His parents did not know that this was from the Lord, who was seeking an occasion to confront the Philistines; for at that time they were ruling over Israel.)" (Judges 14:4) Are we being told that Samson is operating within the will of the Lord when he decides to marry the Philistine woman? Or are we being told that Samson is acting against the will of the Lord but that the Lord uses Samson's mistake as a way of infiltrating the Philistines? It is difficult to imagine the Lord instructing any believer to marry an idolater. This goes against everything He has said to the Israelites regarding marriage. He not only instructed them to avoid marriage with idolaters but also ordered them to make no treaties with them and to show no mercy toward them. He said the same thing regarding marriage to the Christian church through the Apostle Paul: "Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? Or what does a believer have in common with an unbeliever? What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols?" (2 Corinthians 6:14-16a)
So if Samson is in the wrong by marrying this idolatrous woman, why does the author of Judges tell us that "this was from the Lord"? I think this is an example of the Lord's permissive will. The Lord has a perfect will for each of us but He also has a permissive will. We are sometimes stubborn and headstrong like Samson. We don't always obey the word of God or obey the godly advice of our elders. We go our own way and make mistakes. But that doesn't mean the Lord can't use even our mistakes as He weaves together the tapestry of our lives. After all, He knows ahead of time what we are going to do. I think the Lord would rather that Samson had married a godly Israelite woman but at the same time the Lord knew he wouldn't. Because the Lord knew exactly what Samson would do, He will use Samson's reckless decision as part of the plan to defeat the Philistines. If Samson had been obedient to the Lord and to his parents and had chosen an Israelite wife instead, the Lord would have brought about Samson's victory over the Philistines in a different way.
As we close our study today, we find Samson and his family on their way to Timnah to arrange the marriage. "Samson went down to Timnah together with his father and mother." (Judges 14:5a) There an incident will occur which Samson will turn into a riddle---a riddle which will become a source of conflict between him and the Philistines.
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