Esau threatened to kill Jacob just as soon as their father dies. Isaac is kept in the dark about this alarming turn of events. Rebekah knows Jacob must get away from Esau until Esau's anger subsides, so she convinces Isaac to send Jacob away to her brother's house in order to arrange a marriage for him. Neither Isaac nor Rebecca wants Jacob marrying a pagan woman. They are already grieved by the two pagan women Esau has married and they don't want a third idolatrous daughter-in-law.
"So Isaac called for Jacob and blessed him. Then he commanded him, 'Do not marry a Canaanite woman. Go at once to Paddan Aram, to the house of your mother's father Bethuel. Take a wife for yourself from there, from among the daughters of Laban, your mother's brother.'" (Genesis 28:1-2) It's bad enough that Esau already has two heathen wives, but now that Jacob is clearly the heir and future leader of the family it's vital that he not make the same mistake.
The Lord promised Abraham a son and so many descendants through that son that no man can count them. God promised Abraham that through one of his descendants (Christ) all nations would be blessed. Jacob's family line, not Esau's, is the one through which the Lord will fulfill His promise. Isaac has resigned himself to this now. In his heart he always wanted something other than what the Lord wanted: for Esau to be his heir and the possessor of the blessings God promised to Abraham. In spite of what the Lord said about Esau and Jacob before their birth, Isaac was determined to give Esau the birthright even though it wasn't God's will. But now, in spite of everything Isaac did to ensure Esau held onto the top spot as eldest son, Jacob has the birthright and the covenant promises God made to Abraham. There's nothing Isaac can do but accept it and transfer all his hopes to his younger son. The words contained in the blessing he speaks over Jacob prove to us that he's now in step with the Lord in this matter. "May God Almighty bless you and make you fruitful and increase your numbers until you become a community of peoples. May He give you and your descendants the blessing given to Abraham, so that you may take possession of the land where you now reside as a foreigner, the land God gave to Abraham." (Genesis 28:3-4)
"Then Isaac sent Jacob on his way, and he went to Paddan Aram, to Laban son of Bethuel the Aramean, the brother of Rebekah, who was the mother of Jacob and Esau." (Genesis 28:5) Jacob is getting away from the rage of his brother but he's about to go to the school of hard knocks. Laban is even craftier than he is, and Jacob will learn what it feels like to be horribly deceived, and he will have to work hard for everything he gets while living in Paddan Aram. While it's true that Jacob is going to become the father of the twelve tribes of Israel, he's not ready at this point to take up such a weighty mantle. The Lord has a lot of work to do on him to make him the man whom He will rename "Israel".
"Now Esau learned that Isaac had blessed Jacob and had sent him to Paddan Aram to take a wife from there, and that when he blessed him he commanded him, 'Do not marry a Canaanite woman,' and that Jacob had obeyed his father and mother and had gone to Paddan Aram." (Genesis 28:6-7)
At this late date Esau recognizes how much it meant to his parents that he and his brother marry believing wives. I am sure Esau must have been taught about the Lord pretty much from birth and about how important it was for him and his descendants to keep believing in and obeying the Lord. He's been told the story of how Rebekah was obtained for his father so his father wouldn't marry a Canaanite woman. The importance of not marrying a heathen must have been stressed to him time and time again, yet it never sunk in. He's not a spiritually-minded man. All the religious instruction he's been given has sailed right over his head all his life. Godliness hasn't mattered much to him in his own heart and it never occurred to him to seek godliness in a mate. I think he completely ignored any instruction that went against what he wanted to do, which is why the Bible stresses the fact that "Jacob obeyed his father and mother" by going to Paddan Aram. I think the Bible makes this statement about Jacob's obedience because Esau didn't obey his father and mother when they told him to find a believing wife. But now, as the scene of Jacob's leaving plays out right before his eyes, he finally understands how much he disappointed his parents when he married two idolatrous women. He knows he went wrong but thinks he can "fix" it. He gets even further out of the will of God by what he does next.
"Esau then realized how displeasing the Canaanite women were to his father Isaac; so he went to Ishmael and married Mahalath, the sister of Nebaioth and the daughter of Ishmael son of Abraham, in addition to the wives he already had." (Genesis 28:8-9) Esau was out of the will of God when he married more than one woman to begin with. God demonstrated the best pattern for marriage when He performed the first wedding ceremony in the Garden of Eden. Adam didn't have two wives. If Adam had needed two wives, God would have given him two wives, but no man needs more than one wife. It's not God's plan for marriage that a man divide his care and affection between two women---or among three or more women. Esau is not "fixing" or "undoing" his previous mistakes simply by making sure his third wife is a believer.
I'm exasperated by Esau but I feel sorry for him at the same time. He's so slow to catch on when it comes to anything pertaining to the Lord and to godliness. He keeps trying to fix things on his own instead of submitting himself to the Lord and asking the Lord what he should do. But the Lord isn't going to leave him where he is now. Just as He must do some work on Jacob, He must do some work on Esau. The next time we see Esau he will have matured into a respectable man. He will have forgiven Jacob and will have learned to make his own way in the world. In Genesis 28 it looks like Esau will never amount to much, but God isn't through with him. And aren't we glad of that? There may have been times in our own lives when it looked like we'd never amount to much, but God didn't give up on us.
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