The church at Ephesus was made up of a variety of people from all sorts of backgrounds, just as our churches are today. Paul tells Timothy how to treat people of different ages, different sexes, and different backgrounds.
"Do not rebuke an older man harshly, but exhort him as if he were your father. Treat younger men as brothers, older women as mothers, and younger women as sisters, with absolute purity." (1 Timothy 5:1-2) Paul knew that there would be times when even the older members of the congregation would need correction in spiritual matters. Timothy is not to talk down to them but is to guide them with respect, as if they were his mother or father. There are men younger than Timothy in the church and he is to remember that they are his brothers in Christ, so he isn't to scold them like they're children but is to encourage them as he would biological younger brothers. He must take care how he interacts with the young women so that he doesn't fall into sexual temptation. He is to always keep in mind that they are his sisters in Christ and he must treat them with the respect that is due daughters of the King. We don't know whether Timothy ever married, but it appears he was still single at the time Paul wrote his letters to him, for in the second letter he will warn Timothy to "flee youthful lusts" (as the KJV and some other versions translate it), so it seems he was still single and needed to be on guard against pre-marital temptations.
There were many widows in the church, as there are today. Women, generally speaking, tend to live longer than men. Some of the widows in the church of Ephesus were left well-off by wealthy husbands and had no need of help from the church. Some had family members who could help them. But some were truly destitute. Paul is going to discuss when and how widows in the church should be assisted. "Give proper recognition to those widows who are really in need. But if a widow has children or grandchildren, these should learn first of all to put their religion into practice by caring for their own family and so repaying their parents and grandparents, for this is pleasing to God." (1 Timothy 5:3-4) You've probably heard the saying, "Charity begins at home." If the family members of widows are truly in the faith, their charity should begin with those in their family who are in need. In those days there was no Social Security for senior citizens, so a widow who had no one to help her could end up homeless and starving. In ancient Ephesus there was no such thing as Social Security or any type of government or social programs for the needy. Paul instructs Timothy to make certain the church helps widows who have no family to take care of them.
Paul now compares the attitudes of different types of widows. "The widow who is really in need and left all alone puts her hope in God and continues night and day to pray and to ask God for help. But the widow who lives for pleasure is dead even while she lives. Give the people these instructions, so that no one may be open to blame. Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever." (1 Timothy 5:5-8) The woman who has no means of help will appeal to the Lord for help, and the church is to be Christ in the world by helping such women and therefore answering the prayers of these women. Verse 6 is a little harder to understand. I consulted several commentaries and each Bible scholar had a different opinion on verse 6. It may be that some of the widows in the church had been left plenty of money to live on, but had mismanaged it by spending it on the pleasures of this world. Or it could be that they were indulging in lustful pursuits, perhaps engaging in physical relationships with men outside of marriage, receiving money and gifts from these men....being "kept women", so to speak. We can't say for sure what Paul means, but he makes it plain that the hearts of some of the widows in the church are true to the world and not true to the Lord
Timothy is to make a list of the widows who need the regular and ongoing help of the church. Paul now tells him who should be on the list and who should not. "No widow may be put on the list of widows unless she is over sixty, has been faithful to her husband, and is well known for her good deeds, such as bringing up children, showing hospitality, washing the feet of the Lord's people, helping those in trouble and devoting herself to all kinds of good deeds." (1 Timothy 5:9-10) The church at Ephesus is to provide for destitute widows of good character, not for women who will spend the money in worldly and sinful ways.
In tomorrow's passage Paul will go on to talk about younger widows and about how to properly pay pastors and elders for their work.
It's important how the church handles money. In essence, it's the Lord's money and it should be used to do the Lord's work. It should be used to pay those who work in the church. It should be used to help members of the church who are truly in need. No matter how large the church, there's only so much extra money to go around, and those who manage the money must be careful that it's being used in ways that honor the Lord. The same can be said for our own finances. The Lord doesn't bless us with money so that we can use it for ungodly things. He intends for us to use our money to provide for our families, to pay our bills, to give to the church and to worthy charities, and to enjoy any that's left over in godly ways.
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